Past Deadline: It's Revolution Time

I thought, in the name of tradition, I would look back at last year’s New Year’s “Revolutions” column to see what I said I would do and how well I fared. Turns out, though, I was rather preoccupied with the prospect of jumping into the Tay River on Jan. 1, 2009, so I didn’t actually have a list of resolutions, other than to survive said jump. Which I did! Yay me! (You’ll notice I didn’t jump in the river this year, which is not intended as a slight against the food bank in any way. I pledged a plunger, but avoided any actual freezing-cold-river stuff.)

So then I looked back to the year before because I am lazy, I mean, because I was curious to see what promises I made heading into 2008.

Nothing.

I could have sworn I write a New Year’s Revolutions column every year, but if I do I must tuck it away in a month other than January because a review of my old files over the past few years revealed I was, apparently, resolutionless.

Perhaps one of my resolutions should be to revere tradition a little more? Nah – that would leave me inflexible for the first column of each new year. What if something else came up? Like weird weather? Or the fact that we really don’t see the world “salubrious” used often enough, not to mention the blatant misuse of the word “notorious” and its cousin, “notoriety.”

And what would an annual New Year’s column be without witty banter about how much the word “prorogue” sounds like “perogy”? (In my opinion, perogies are tastier than questionable parliamentary practices that seem to be useful when people have lots of critical questions to ask.)

Ahem. Who let in that annoying grammarian/political analyst? We need to get back to loftier debates, such as what a good girl I am going to be in 2010.

Right then.

After the positively gluttonous holiday season I have had, it’s going to take a virtually non-stop diet of celery and a running program of Forrest Gump proportions to recover lost pounds – not to mention lost endurance. Sigh. Oh, December, what woe you wrought upon my eating and exercise routine!

As my age creeps awfully high into the late 30s it has become painfully (painfully!) obvious that falling off the wagon is extraordinarily detrimental. I recently wrote a column about how long it has taken me to lose weight despite starting a running program in the summer. It took me five months to lose nine pounds. Meanwhile, in a measly four weeks I’ve regained six of those hard-fought pounds, and I’m quite certain they are going to be a real nuisance to lose again.

No one to blame but myself and a strenuous December work schedule, though. I suppose I could have been nervously munching on grapes instead of, well, everything else.

Sigh.

Fortunately, I have a most excellent virtual running nag – I mean buddy – who is persistently sending messages from Calgary to encourage me to stop talking about it and just do it. And by the time this missive hits the paper, I’m sure I will have hit the snowy pavement again.
Probably in more ways than one.

You know, I think maybe the reason I haven’t had a column of resolutions for the last couple of years (at least as far as I can tell) is because they really are, essentially, always the same and you probably get tired of hearing it:
1. Eat better.
2. Exercise more.
3. Be a good person.
4. Be kind to children and animals.
5. Save the world.

Blah blah blah. I suppose to shake things up a bit I should move that “save the world” thing closer to the top. I learned a few years back that it’s a good idea to set realistic and achievable goals – hence the better eating and the running and the kindness thing (yes, I can be kind).

That all said, though, it doesn’t hurt to set a goal that’s going to stretch one’s limits a bit. I’ll let you know how it all turns out. Actually, if I manage to save the world you might hear about it.

Published in The Perth Courier on Jan. 5/10
PS - Sorry to be so late with this post. Also, I did run - on Jan. 3. Still a work in progress!